{ "item_title" : "Becoming Baba", "item_author" : [" Aymann Ismail "], "item_description" : "From Slate staff writer Aymann Ismail comes an exquisite memoir about fatherhood, religion, and the search for identity in an ever-shifting world. The son of Egyptian immigrants, Aymann Ismail came of age in the shadow of 9/11, tracking the barrage of predatory headlines pervading the media and influencing the popular consciousness about Muslims. After a series of bomb threats were directed at his Islamic school in Teaneck, New Jersey, just a few miles from downtown Manhattan, his parents--anxious that it was no longer safe to be so explicitly Muslim--enrolled him in public school, where he was the only Muslim his new friends had ever met. In the privacy of their home, they turned to their faith for guidance on how to live, adhering to traditional notions about gender roles, and avoiding the putative American dangers of alcohol, sex, and rebellion. And yet, Aymann is undeniably an American teenager, negotiating his place in multiple worlds while chafing against the structures of his upbringing. He eventually embarks on a career in political journalism, in part to establish his own version of things. In time, though, he also gains a deeper understanding and appreciation for his parents' values and sacrifices--his father's grueling work ethic as a town car driver, and his mother's adeptness at managing their itinerant family. When Aymann meets and falls in love with Mira, a woman with her own ideas about the modern Muslim family, his world shifts yet again. After Mira gets pregnant with their first child, Aymann begins to reckon with his past, future, and the beliefs that have shaped his life. What does it mean to be a Muslim man? More still, what does it mean to be any man--and a father to a baby boy and girl? And how best to honor one's cultural heritage while holding space for change and discovery? In lucid, confident prose, Aymann Ismail questions the sturdy frameworks of religion and family, the legacies of his childhood, and what will become his children's ethical and intellectual inheritance. To reckon unflinchingly with these questions offers him a road map for his young Muslim children on how to navigate the singular journey into adulthood.", "item_img_path" : "https://covers4.booksamillion.com/covers/bam/0/38/554/961/038554961X_b.jpg", "price_data" : { "retail_price" : "28.00", "online_price" : "28.00", "our_price" : "28.00", "club_price" : "28.00", "savings_pct" : "0", "savings_amt" : "0.00", "club_savings_pct" : "0", "club_savings_amt" : "0.00", "discount_pct" : "10", "store_price" : "28.00" } }

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“Is it possible to raise kids who feel secure and confident in their ability in an increasingly confusing and isolating time for Muslim Americans? And, if so, can I learn?” In Becoming Baba: Fatherhood, Faith, and Finding Meaning in America, multimedia journalist, podcaster and young father Aymann Ismail sets out to find the answers to these questions. Written with humor and affection, Becoming Baba gives the reader a unique insight into the struggle facing many Muslim Americans as they reconcile their faith with American culture.

Baba is the Arabic word for dad, or daddy. Ismail’s quest to be a good baba, triggered by the birth of his first son, is inextricably bound to his quest to be a good Muslim. But that raises the question: What is a good Muslim? Is it someone who strives to perfectly adhere to Islam’s rules, like Ismail’s own baba? Or is it something else?

If it’s the former, it soon becomes clear that Ismail is not a good Muslim. The youngest son of Egyptian immigrants, he committed all kinds of lapses: skipping school, smoking pot, dating women who don’t wear the hijab, etc. His mother worries that he is becoming too American and will lose his grounding in Islamic and Egyptian traditions. His father, increasingly disappointed, becomes ever more emotionally distant, until his conversations with Ismail consist almost entirely of judgmental, hurtfully delivered Islamic aphorisms and proverbs. 

Luckily for Ismail, he is blessed with two incredible gifts: the love of his wife, Mira, whose wisdom is inspired by her own spiritual journey, and his own ability to acknowledge and apologize for his faults. Ismail has a refreshing humility, and reading his memoir is like listening to a friend say, “Ugh—I was such a jerk” while smacking himself on the forehead. Ultimately, it is this humility and his desire to be a good husband and baba that enable Ismail to forgive himself, his mother and, especially, his father. The good Muslim—and the good baba—is not the perfect adherent, he learns, but the flawed human who, while grappling with his faults and confusion, leaves himself open to Allah’s forgiveness and extends that same grace to his children.